Kids Say the Darnedest Things

In some ways I wish I could just record every word that comes out of my kids' mouths. If you only knew how choosy I was with the "jokes" I record. Their dad is hilarious---to other people; sometimes to me, but mostly other people and our kids. So naturally these two yahoos would take after his witty sense of humor.

For instance:

The kids were fighting. I am big on making them repeat Bible verses as part of the re-direction/correction process.
M: A Friend Loves at ALL times...Proverbs 17:17
MW: I NOT love Lei Lei all times.
M: ::trying to fight back a smirk and laugh:: Not kind Micah, not kind, she is your very best friend, so treat her like one!
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Micah apologizes all.the.time. If he barely taps you it's "I'm sorry mama..." I was telling Chad this--
Chad: "Well, he's a man, he is just practicing for the future when that is all he will do."
M: Funny.
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MW: Lei Lei loves me MUCH! ::hugs her very tight!::
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Micah is potty trained as you know. And his new thing to do is say "wiggle wiggle wiggle" as he goes potty while wiggle wiggle wiggling his boy parts. I just think it is too funny not to share or remember, sorry if you are offended. :) Not sure where he learned it, but I suppose it doesn't take boys long to figure that out. HA!

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I have this new sleep app and it monitors my sleep. Chad gets into bed like a herd of elephants, messing up my app. So I tell him this.
Chad: oh this from you Miss Gymnastic flips all over the bed all night.
M: Whatever, I am as graceful as a ballerina.
Chad: A ballerina who is tripping over her toe shoes.
{one of those rare moments I found him funny-most likely because I was tired. ;) )
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Chad started calling Lo Lil Bit.
Lo: Well come on big bit.
Chad completely dumb founded...
M: you called her Lil Bit, so she is calling YOU big bit.
Lo: Yeah, see daddy. Lil bit (points to herself). Big bit (points to daddy).
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Leighton was not napping. When I got on her she said "Well, God told me to wake up and clean up this mess!"
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She plays draw something with the neighbors. I hear her shout "Micah scribbled this and then her no guess it now." Probably had to be there, but it was hilarious. Micah is always up in her grill and she takes her draw something game very serious.
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One afternoon after Easter we were walking around the neighborhood and she found a lost plastic egg in someone's yard. She opened it and it was empty she exclaims "HE IS RISEN!!!" {thank you Resurrection Eggs!}
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Leigthon is learning to spell. One day she spelled cat on her own K-A-T and shows me. Mommy what does this say?
M: Cat, but honey Cat starts with a "C" not a "K."
Lo: well then what does THIS spell {shows me the same word KAT}
M: Cat, but cat starts with a "C."
Lo: but mommy then what does this spell.
M: CAT!!!!!! I know it doesn't make sense, but cat starts with a "C" not a "K."
Lo: Fine then mommy, but I still don't know what this spells.
M: heavy sigh. This is why I am NOT a teacher...

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Leighton has been into re-naming everyone lately. She has re-named Micah--Kason, Brecken, and Kasalyn. One day she called him one of these names for the 100th time and Micah shouts loudly in the middle of the store "my name is MICAH!"
BAHAHAHA!