Throwback Thursday

I was on my FB page and stumbled onto this questionnaire I filled out right after Leighton was born. I wasn't a blogger back in her early days and so a lot of these things never got recorded. So for Throwback Thursday I thought I would post it. It is probably incredibly boring to you all, but priceless to me!

 1. WAS YOUR FIRST PREGNANCY PLANNED?
Sort of, I just stopped taking the pill about 1.5 YEARS before I got myself knocked up. We just waited to see what happened of course nothing for quite awhile, but it was all in God's perfect timing!

2. WERE YOU MARRIED AT THE TIME?
Yes, four and 1/2 years

3. WHAT WERE YOUR REACTIONS?
Sheer excitement! I mean it took so long to get pregnant that I couldn't believe it! I called the doctor right away to get a confirmation. I just sat and cried tears of joy!

4. WAS ABORTION AN OPTION FOR YOU?
There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that would EVER make me even consider abortion! NOTHING!!! 

5. HOW OLD WERE YOU?
I was 25 when I found out

6. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT YOU WERE PREGNANT?
Pregnancy test. I did it first thing in the morning thinking that it wouldn't be positive again, even though I had all the symptoms, but when I did a double take and saw those two lines I about died!!! 

7. WHO DID YOU TELL FIRST?
I wanted to tell my hubby in a special way and I had been planning ways all along, but when the time came all I could do was to run out of the bathroom to tell him. I did maintain my composure long enough to ask him "look at me from the side, do I look different to you?" He of course thought I was a nut and then I whipped out the pregnancy test and then all of our excitement set in!

8. DID YOU WANT TO FIND OUT THE SEX?
YES! Although, while ppl may laugh at me I knew it was a girl from conception! And of course I was right!

9. DUE DATE?
February 27th, 2009

10. DID YOU HAVE MORNING SICKNESS?
Yes, there were moments I thought I would die! Luckily no vomitting for me...just severe nausea.

11. WHAT DID YOU CRAVE?
Sadly, I never really had any cravings. I would crave foods after I had them. For instance one day we went to Crackle Barrel and I had blueberry pancakes, and for like a month I craved blueberry pancakes! 

12. WHO/WHAT IRRITATED YOU THE MOST?
Nothing/No one 

13. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CHILD'S SEX?
Girl

14. DID YOU WISH YOU HAD THE OPPOSITE SEX OF WHAT YOU WERE GETTING?
No I really just wanted a healthy baby! And I did want a girl, but would have been just as happy to have a boy!

15. HOW MANY POUNDS DID YOU GAIN THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY?
26 pounds

16. DID YOU HAVE A BABY SHOWER?
yes, 3

17. WAS IT A SURPRISE OR DID YOU KNOW?
I knew about all but one of them! My small group surprised us one nite!

18. DID YOU HAVE ANY COMPLICATIONS DURING YOUR PREGNANCY?
I had early on bleeding and a low lying placenta which had to be checked again around 30 weeks to determine if I would need a C-section or not. Thankfully, my pregnancy turned out perfect!

19. WHERE DID YOU GIVE BIRTH?
VCRMC-ST. Joe---Wichita, KS

20. HOW MANY HOURS WERE YOU IN LABOR?
I was in off and on again labor for about 2 weeks prior to actually having her. I was making a little progress each week, but nothing to put me into full on labor...I am what you call a 'slow starter' Anyway on Sunday the 15th I started having contractions again at church, of course I was use to that but somewhere during the afternoon around 2 the pain in my lower pelvic and back was so intense I couldn't sit, stand or lie down...again not thinking that this is what labor or contractions should feel like I resisted going to the hospital, until I called my mom crying and she forced us (well me) to go! They kept me in "observation" for 2.5 hours where I finally went from a 3 to 5. They offered me my epidural!!!! They barely got that in and going (seriously 45 minutes later) I was at a 10 and they started taking the bed apart and said it was time to push! An hour later Leighton was here!!! I think my labor and delivery was easier than the whole pregnancy! 

21. WHO DROVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL?
Chad (hubby)

22. WHO WATCHED YOU GIVE BIRTH?
Just Chad and the biggest team of Dr. and nurses I have seen!

23. WAS IT NATURAL OR C-SECTION?
Natural

24. DID YOU TAKE MEDICINE TO EASE THE PAIN?
EPIDURAL!!!!

27. HOW MUCH DID YOUR CHILD WEIGH?
6 lbs., 10 oz.

28. WHEN WAS YOUR CHILD ACTUALLY BORN ?
February 15, 2009 . . . about 12 days early

30. WHAT DID YOU NAME HIM/HER?
Leighton Olivia

31. HOW OLD IS YOUR FIRST BORN TODAY?
12 days!

One Month Post Op {My Miracle}

The 21st marked one month after Micah's surgery!
I am so thankful all went so well and so smoothly. If you could just see what an awesome happy little boy he is today because of it.

Micah is my miracle baby.
Getting pregnant wasn't an easy task for us. When we decided we would like to try and have another I pretty much just went straight to the doc and said look we are going to need help getting pregnant. He obliged and put me on clomid. Fertility drugs take all the joy out of getting pregnant. I will just leave it at that. However, about halfway through the our first cycle of clomid I just was over this. Too many feelings were coming back about how hard this was and how this is NOT the way I wanted to have another baby. I said forget I don't care what the calendar says.

I remember sitting in the car with Chad telling him this and saying "I would be shocked if we were pregnant and I don't want to do this anymore." I felt like if God wanted us to have another baby then He would give us one and I wasn't going to do a bunch of clomid cycles just to get one. This was a one time deal.

Fast forward a few weeks. That's right One clomid cycle. Two pink lines. Honestly looking back at the charts, I am still not sure how we ended up pregnant, nothing matched up right. Seriously. God's mighty hand for sure. Miracle baby.

Fast forward to our 20 week sono. You can read about all our fears and worries here thanks to an irregular sono not to mention all my pre-term labor and struggling to keep him IN for as long as possible. Fast forward to 35.5/36 weeks gestation. He is here. Perfect and healthy. Miracle baby.

Micah tends to frustrate me at times, he is a high need and demanding baby. Some say it is because of all he has been through physically {read: reflux, hungry, vomiting all the time}, who knows I am not buying it. But what I do buy is that God gave us this precious little boy for a reason, he and all babies are miracles really, but he will forever be my miracle baby. The little boy I never knew I always needed.
 

Blue.

On this day last year we found out our world was about to get rough and tumble, with the sweet baby BOY I was carrying.
Not going to lie, we were all completely shocked. I was just dead sure we would only ever have girls. A boy was just not even in my realm of thinking.

When the sono tech was searching around I remember seeing things and whispering to Chad "boy?" But then thinking no way, I just don't know what I am seeing. Moments later she confirmed it. It was a BOY!



My reaction was less than excited. I didn't want a boy. I don't know what to do with boys. Lo needed a sister. I may have cried later. I may have hoped the sono was wrong many times over the coming months, even though we had some pretty definitive shots.

The thing is I am so beyond glad this wasn't my choice to make for our family, because clearly I would have chosen girl. But God knew what He was doing when He gave me my Micah bear. The moment that little boy was born he was all mine and I can't for the life of me remember why I ever thought two girls would have been so great. If you don't have a boy {and a girl} you just won't get it. Boys do have a way of just stealing their mommies hearts in such a different way than their daughters do. My Micah bear captivated me and I would {but we won't. ;)} gladly take 3 more of him.


I still don't really know what to do with a boy, but I am learning and loving every minute of being a mom to a beautiful girl and handsome little boy. Lo was made to be a sister to a brother, just another example God knew what He was doing. As if I should ever doubt.


Thank You God for turning my world Blue {and Pink}.

On This Day

On this day last year we found out we were pregnant. You can re-read my thoughts about that day here.


I just find it so amazing how different our lives look a year later.


While my days are difficult and trying with Micah I am so thankful for him. I never in my life imagined another baby, let alone a boy. God is good.

Congratulations Micah Bear you won the race. :)

Final Watch Mommy Grow

I saw this on another blog and decided to do the same, it's so hard to remember all the details.

How far along were you when you had your baby? 36 weeks

How long was labor? 10+ weeks. ;) But then super real intense never-ending contractions started the Monday before Micah was born and really picked up by 2a the Saturday (day before) he entered the world. It was a tough pregnancy not goin' lie.

Total weight gain? 21 pounds

Total weight loss since? 19 pounds. This close to my pre-pregnancy weight. I have got to stop eating those brownies. :)

I love how he falls asleep to my heartbeat.

Back into your own clothes yet? Pretty much.

Did you get stretch marks? Not one stretch mark with either baby.

What do you miss about being pregnant? I am not someone who even remotely pretends to enjoy pregnancy. But I do miss just the specialness of being just me and Micah together, feeling him inside. I don't miss all the pre-term labor I went through to get him here though.

How big is the baby? Micah was 8#9z at my 6 week check. {Now because I forgot to post this "on time" he is 10#}

8 weeks old.

Are you breastfeeding? Yes. It is still rough going. Micah is what I call a lazy nurser. Once again night and day different from Lo. She was all about the nursing efficiently, which I loved, especially at night. So Micah and I "fight" a lot over nursing, sometimes he wins, sometimes I win.

How is baby's temperament? Overall, a very happy baby boy. Such a refreshing change from when Lo was a baby. You get really riled up after nursing a lot, due to some digestive issues. :( But we are working on fixing that...

What are you looking forward to? Watching Micah grow up, interacting with us and Lo and reaching all his milestones. Oh and sleeping through the night again. :)

It's A Baby Story {Part 3}

I had no birth plan. I learned that lesson during Lo's delivery. Nothing goes the way you want it to because L&D is so unplanned. All you can do is go with the flow. This time my "birth plan" held 1 thing and that was how I wanted Lo to meet Micah for the first time.

First family photo
{in my post-partum suite}

Chad and I told the families that we wanted Lo to meet her brother for the first time by herself with us only {and maybe my sister Meg at the video camera, since she is currently at KU's film school}. So whenever it was time for her to come up to the hospital anyone in the room (besides medical professionals) would be asked to leave. As "luck" would have it he came in the middle of the day, so she was actually the first to meet him!

Sadly, Meg was just 20 minutes out when Lo arrived at the hospital, and while it would have been special to capture the first meeting on video it was unfeasible to keep her occupied in the hospital waiting room that long, plus I was dying to see her!!

Checking out little brother for the first time.

When she came in she wasn't so sure what was going on. She was just so happy to see us! Then we showed her Micah and she just loved on him. There has yet to be a moment of jealousy. ::knock on wood::

We gave her a BIG SISTER gift to help ease any potential jealousy and make her feel uber special too. She got a juice bottle for her baby and immediately tried to feed Micah with it! She is just such a good mommy already. I have been amazed at how much love and affection she shows her brother.


She kept asking to "old" {hold} him, so of course I helped her. And then after a minute she bounced off and ran around trying doing her own goofy Lo Lo thing! Then she would stop and remember Micah and come hug him again, and then off she went again.

She wanted to read him her Cars book.

I think they are going to have a special bond and relationship. I am so glad how it all worked out and so relieved that she is attaching to him so well and not regressing in any way. {ie in potty training, or wanting to be a baby etc etc.}

First kisses.
Technically he is trying to nurse her face, but still sweet. :)

I have one more part to It's A Baby Story to finish off meeting the family and my fun filled hospital stay! ;)

It's A Baby Story {Part 2}

So where were we? {to see Part 1 click HERE}

On the way to the hospital. Chad has this little sports type car that seriously could put any one into labor they way you bounce around in there. So the journey to the hospital was less than pleasant. Definitely helped my contractions pick up that is for sure!

Once we arrive we went up to the Peri-natal Unit (PSU) and got gowned up and checked back in. I was a tad annoyed that I had to re-answer all the same questions I was just asked on Friday night, I was like can't you just pull that info, I am dying here and can barely talk! I digress.

The RN asked if my water had broke. I said I was unsure, I felt like I was leaking, but I knew it hadn't truly "broke." So she ran an amnio test on me. Negative.

This RN was so nice and compassionate about everything. It was much slower up there on Sunday, which probably helped everyone's attitudes. Anyway, after about 15 minutes on the fetal heart and contraction monitor; in walks a (pregnant) KSU-alum Resident. Score! I knew she would be awesome. :) She checked me I told her about my ordeal on Friday, she and the RN thought they were crazy on Friday and in not so many words...wrong. Again I digress.

I was a 4 and 100% effaced with my bag bulging, she couldn't even tell if he was head down.
Now normally if you are not pre-term you would be admitted at this point, but lucky me I am pre-term, therefore, I get to wait one hour to see if I had progressed any. I was praying hard! The resident was confident I would be staying, but you never know. She say my contraction pattern was less than impressive, which I agreed. With Lo I was contracting hard every 45 sec, and with Micah, as I said before, I would get going every 2-3 minutes with off the chart contractions that made me want to die and then it would slow to every 10 minutes with contractions that would rate a 4 on a pain scale. I just didn't get it. But an hour elapsed and at 1145a the resident said I was a 5 and I could be admitted.

I could tell she was possibly fudging it a bit, but I appreciate not being treated like I should be following the textbook labor and like a real person. She knew sending me home wasn't a good idea. They teach 'em right up there at Kansas State. ;) {Yes, she went to KU for Med school, but that is besides the point.}

After filling out more paper work, consenting to my epidural and being poke FOUR times like a pin cushion to get my IV in, we were on our way to L&D! I was just so thrilled. I started bawling. 1. because I was hurting from all their needles sticks and contractions and 2. because this was all finally happening. They believed me and I was in labor and going to meet my son very soon!

It was also really nice that I could "enjoy" my labor. With Lo everything happened so fast, I "enjoyed" nothing. I had her in 6 hours from the moment I walked through the PSU doors to the moment she debut. This one seemed to be moving a bit slower--in the end he came faster in 5 hours, but now I am ahead of myself.

I got in my room, I got my epidural and really I didn't feel like I really needed it yet, but since I was at a 5 and 100% with a bulging bag, I figured why not, it won't slow me down that much at this point.

However, according to Chad 5 minutes after my epi went "live" my contraction monitor went off the charts with contractions and I was like "what? I am having a contraction?" HA! With Lo I could still feel pressure, which I do prefer, especially when it comes time to push. But it was nice to finally have a break from all my contractions. I think 10+ weeks of on and off again labor call for an early epidural. My body was tired.

Here I am after my epi went "live!" It is such a weird, yet euphoric feeling. :)

Anyway, I made Chad go down and get something to eat and watched the end of Pirates of the Caribbean. I found this so fun, because again with Lo there was no time to turn on the TV. Chad comes back and finishes up his lunch.

It is now 2p. I start feeling this ballooning pressure down in my pelvis and thighs. I honestly felt like that girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory that swells up like a blueberry. I paged my RN and she thought I was weird, but was going to call the KSU resident. At that same moment in walks the doc on call that would be delivering me, Dr. Bammel. He comes in to introduce himself and check on where things were. He couldn't even check me because my bag of waters was bulging so much. He popped my waters at 205p. Micah drops way down to a +2 and Dr. B says "Whoa! You are ready to go right now!" My RN starts "freaking out" because she wasn't not prepared for that at all. I suppose I should have told her I go fast, but it is in the chart. Oh well.

So they yank the bed apart barely get everything in place and by 215p I am pushing. It was so weird this time because all I could feel were my Dumbo legs. I couldn't tell when to push or if I even was. But they all said I was doing good, and obviously I did something right because 15 minutes later he was out! It took me nearly and hour with Lo. Of course he was a bit smaller.

The official weight picture. 5# even.

I actually got to see him being pulled out, he was so purple (normal). Daddy cut the cord and they whisked him away to check on him. I could hear his little cry and I just started bawling, I couldn't believe he was here. The funny thing was that Lo was a 38 weeker and had an entire Neonate team in there to "catch" her (she was a meconium baby), and he had just one little nurse. Of course we were right next door to the NICU just in case.

My tiny little biscuit, I couldn't believe he was a blondie. Lo was very dark headed.
They are night and day different I tell ya.

Chad said he looked normal and everyone said he was healthy. Chad kept taking pictures and bringing me the camera. That is the worse thing they do to moms. Take their babies and make them wait to hold them, after all the work we do. Of course both my babies demanded immediate medical attention and I prefer their safety over my happiness.

Proud Daddy! He has his boy and now we are complete.

Finally, they brought him to me and I was in love. I never thought I wanted a boy, but it just feels so right and complete to have him here. He is so perfect and I get why people get so smitten with their boys.

No words, for the emotions washing over me the second he was placed in my arms.

I will again leave the story here. Up next meeting his BIG SISTER!

It's A Baby Story {Part 1}

The road to Micah's birth was long and difficult, but well well worth it. It is as if none of it even matters now that he is here, but of course I will still tell you all about it. :)

I am going to break it up into a few parts, mostly because I want to capture every detail for myself and Micah. So please bare with me.


As you know I have been in pre-term labor for quiet sometime, since 26 weeks to be exact, but as the end of December came the contractions were getting more frequent and intense, and picking up in regularity. However, once I was finally able to really sit and rest they would subside generally in 3 hours.

Then the second week of January hit and things really started to pick up and I was getting nervous I wasn't going to get my consulting job done before I had this little man. Through all of this I can see God's hand at work, now. I was really starting to become quiet frustrated with my slow on and off again pre-term labor. While I wanted Micah to be born as healthy as possible, I also wanted my labor to end and the only way that was going to happen at this point was to give birth. So here is how it all finally went down.

Sunday Jan 9th {35 weeks}: I woke up and started having some things going on that indicated labor was getting closer, along with a few contractions. We went to church and then I came home and started getting last minute preparations done, such as packing, going to the store, getting Lo's schedule written down, etc. I kept thinking I would go into labor that night, but was secretly hoping he would wait until Tues because it was 1-11-11. :)

Monday Jan 10th: Contractions picking up and now we are in a middle of a snow storm. I am trying to rest as much as I can with a toddler, but by her nap time I am not doing so great and email Chad that I may need him to come home early or at the very least leave as soon as school was dismissed. We kept in lots of communication.

I called my OB's nurse and she said based on my symptoms it was really up to me whether I wanted to go in to the hospital or not...gee thanks for the help.

On a side note: I spent 3 hours in Peri-natal with Lo because I was only 38weeks and our hospitals policy is to do nothing to augment labor until you are 39 weeks or in "active" labor (ie at 4cm+). I was a 3 when I went in, bleeding heavily, and contracting every 45 secs for 1 minute, evidently that doesn't equal "active" labor in their books.

SO rushing into the hospital to go through that again sounded like zero fun, I decided to wait. Again by the time Chad got home things started to calm down again.

Tues Jan 11th: Nothing but a few off and on again contractions. :( Bummer it was 1-11-11.

Wednesday and Thursday: I had to work both days. More of the same, on and off again contractions but nothing very stable, just frustrating.

Wednesday--I had my OB appointment, she checked me and said I was 3cm dilated and the baby was head down. This was promising to me that at least all this wasn't for naught.

When I told Megan, my sister, who was babysitting Lo she said "Now, baby you can't come Friday, maybe Saturday, but Sunday would definitely be better." I really wanted to smack her because I am dying and all she is thinking about is herself. ;) This was TOC weekend which is a big weekend that my mom and us girls work for the high school. However, in hindsight a very fortuitous statement.

Friday Jan 14th: By the time Chad got home I wasn't doing well at all and while I wasn't dying, I felt like I should finally go in and be checked out since I was a 3 on Wednesday I could have progressed a lot more and not even know it and actually need to deliver.

So to the Peri-natal unit (PSU) we went. My MIL met us there and took Lo back home. Because I was only 35 weeks they ran a bunch of cultures to make sure my pre-term labor wasn't due to a kidney infection or BV. Then the doctor checked me he said I was only 1 and 40% effaced!

"A 1??!" I said..."My doctor just checked me Wednesday and said I was a 3, it isn't possible to go backwards is it?"

"Not generally" he said.

I have never been more frustrated then I was at that moment. I am dying, they don't care, and they are arguing with me about this. I realize I am not a doctor, but seriously a 1 to a 3 is a big difference. They said they would monitor me for an hour and if I progressed they would go from there. I just wanted to go home, I was so upset. Of course after an hour I didn't progress and they d/c me. My snotty miss know it all nurse said see you in maybe 3 weeks. I just shot her a look as we left, like thanks for nothing. But I know I will be back before then.

So home we went. I cried most of the way. I just didn't understand, why did I have to go through this?! It wasn't that I wanted Micah here, I just wanted labor to stop. I didn't sleep well that night thanks to the contractions, plus just being so aggravated about my PSU experience.

Me pretending to have a good time in the PSU Friday night. :)

Saturday Jan 15th: Got up and decided I would not be going back to PSU until my water broke or I could no longer sit, stand or walk (like in my labor with Lo). We decided to make a family day out of Saturday. It was Lo's 23 mo birthday. We wanted to take her to Exploration Place to have one last special time with just her. Nothing was going to keep me from that.

Lo at Exploration Place having a blast.

Saturday night I was contracting just some and decided to go to bed early. I told Chad he should come to bed earl(ier) too just in case. Around 130a I was contracting hard, but I couldn't see the clock so I couldn't time them. I was refusing to give into it because I didn't want to go back to PSU until at least the morning and even then it better be bad. By 2a I couldn't focus any more and woke Chad up to time them. They were coming every 5-7 minutes and lasting for 1 minute. By 3a we decided to stop timing and try to get some rest. I told Chad my goal was to wait until the morning before we go back in. I just had to see Lo one last time before I left, plus I didn't want to call anyone over to our house at 2a, just so we can get sent home again!

God intervened and slowed my contractions from 330a-445a so I could sleep! I was up by 5am packing up my little PSU bag, since the rest of it was still packed from Friday night's fun there. At this point I was still contracting but nothing regular like earlier that evening. I was ticked. So I started walking and pacing in my basement to see if that would get things going again.

Sunday Jan 16th: By 7a I called my parents to say we wouldn't be at church since I had been laboring all night and that they needed to leave their phones on, because they would be the closest to get to our house if I decided to go back in.

By 730a plans changed. I called my dad back and asked them to come now and sit with me, so when I was finally ready to go in we could.

At this point my contractions were still a little irregular, but some were off the charts strong and others we barely noticeable (by comparison). At this point my parents couldn't get here fast enough. I finally got a hold of them around 915a to see where in the world they were because in my mind it was taking too long for them to get here. They said they were 15 minutes out, and I said good because we are leaving as soon as you get here!

By 930a we are in the car and on our way to the hospital.

I am going to leave the story here. Stay tuned. :) But here's a sneak preview of what happens. ::wink wink::

He's Here!!

On Sunday afternoon, 2:33pm, to be exact

MICAH WYATT

made his early (but long awaited) debut into our lives.

He is perfect and healthy for a 36 weeker!
Weighing in at 5# 17.5in long

Both mommy and baby are doing fine. We just were released from the hospital yesterday around 12 and still settling in. Lots of pictures and stories to come. Promise.

For those of you wondering Lo is THE.BEST.BIG.SISTER.EVER. She loves him so much and is so gentle (most of the time, she forgets her strength) with him. So far she is adjusting very well, but I know only time will tell and get us all fully adjusted to this new addition in our lives.

PS. I have scheduled several random blog posts, so some of them may strike you as odd as to why I am posting these when my handsome little biscuit is here...just know I did it weeks before he arrived. And I will get you all acquainted with Micah very soon!

35.5 weeks {aka Watch Mommy Grow}

How far along: 35w 4d-I am doing these a bit more often now, since it is so close the end there is "more" to report. :)

35 weeks with Baby Q

isn't my girl a doll face?!

35 weeks w/ Lo.

Total Wt Gain/Loss: +20# :/ I really should just stop looking at the scale, I find it terribly depressing...I know it's "good" and all, but it doesn't mean I have to like it.

Maternity Clothes: Definitely wearing, especially pants! I love dresses and tunics, but mostly just live in sweats.

Best Moment thus far: Finding out he is head down! I was really started to worry he was breech and I want to avoid a c-section at all costs. I kept feeling jabs and kicks at my bladder and not at my ribs, which is what got me panicking that he wasn't head down!

Gender: BOY!

Movement: Still a "sleepy" baby and hardly moves at all.

Milestones: Baby’s senses are continuing to improve -- when light peeks in through your (extremely) stretched belly, those tiny eyelids and irises blink and dilate. And, baby can now recognize and react to simple songs… time to start practicing your lullabies! Growth (at least inside your womb) is starting to slow, and you may notice baby descend into your pelvis at the end of this month. ~(courtesy of thebump.com)

Food Cravings: none really anymore.

What I miss: Being skinny. I see cute clothes that I want to wear, but can't. :(

Sleep: What is sleep? Because I am not getting it. I hurt, I am HOT, I can't find a comfortable position and then when I do I have to get up and tinkle. Plus, my mind is just racing with all the unknowns, like when will he get here, who will take care of Lo, do we have everything, I still need to do... so frustrating, I just wish I could shut down my mind.

What I am looking forward to: The end. 4ish weeks and counting!!! {God willing} I am no longer trying to enjoy this pregnancy I am so over it. Only because I am tired of this limbo labor I am in. Who the heck wants to be contracting for weeks on end and be mean to their family because of it. Just get out already, so I can resume life.

Belly Button: Totally popped out. So embarrassing.

What I learned at my pre-natal visit:
35 week appt-His heart beat is 139bpm. My OB checked me I am 3cm dilated and nearly 90% effaced. Baby is head down {HUGE answer to prayer, because let's face not too much else has gone "right" this time around}, he is completely engaged and ready to come out! And other things that you veteran mommies know happens when you are at this point and that dilated. FUN! :/
Also, my OB said at this point they will do nothing to stop my labor, but she will do nothing to help it if I go in to the hospital unless I am at a 6 or 7 then they will break my waters etc. So that is good news, I definitely don't want labor stopped at this point.

GD Appt: My blood sugars have been awesome, so she doesn't need to see me for two weeks! Yay me!

Symptoms: Have I mentioned contractions and back labor?
Yeah, they have been intense and causing me to actually consider going to the hospital. Monday, I nearly had my husband come home, in the snow storm to take me, but decided to wait a bit longer. Finally, I went to bed thinking I would try and sleep as much as I could, because I was sure we would have a late night run, 3 hours later it all stopped.
Now it is Wednesday and they are back at it. I am so sick of it. This has been going on for 10+ weeks and I am done. My patience and tolerance {for practically everything} is gone. And now that I know things are progressing it has become more frustrating. I hate being a slow starter. I just hang at the precipices teetering until BAM! I am full on in labor, barely getting my epi in time before pushing! I don't even get to "enjoy" L&D because I move so fast.

I know he will be here before I know it and this will all be a distant memory, but for now this is just how I feel.

34/35 Weeks {aka Watch Mommy Grow}

How far along: 34w 4d

34 weeks with Baby Q

I am lookin' pretty exhausted these days...and no there isn't a beach ball under there. HA!

Total Wt Gain/Loss: +18# :/ I really should just stop looking at the scale, I find it terribly depressing...I know it's "good" and all, but it doesn't mean I have to like it.

Maternity Clothes: Definitely wearing, especially pants! I love dresses and tunics, but mostly just live in sweats.

Best Moment thus far: I am really getting anxious to meet him. I am starting to wonder what he will look like, hair? no hair? who will he favor? what will his personality be like? will he be a sleeper? or colicky like Lo?

Gender: BOY!

Movement: His movements aren't as great as Lo's were. I just feel him some, enough to know that he is in fact still alive. Not sure if this is a good thing or not?! Maybe this means he will be easy going and a sleeper?!

Milestones: Baby’s senses are continuing to improve -- when light peeks in through your (extremely) stretched belly, those tiny eyelids and irises blink and dilate. And, baby can now recognize and react to simple songs… time to start practicing your lullabies! Growth (at least inside your womb) is starting to slow, and you may notice baby descend into your pelvis at the end of this month. ~(courtesy of thebump.com)

Food Cravings: none really anymore.

What I miss: My brain. It is official gone. Mommy brain + pregnancy brain is not a good combo! :)

Sleep: What is sleep? Because I am not getting it. I hurt, I am HOT, I can't find a comfortable position and then when I do I have to get up and tinkle. Plus, my mind is just racing with all the unknowns, like when will he get here, who will take care of Lo, do we have everything, I still need to do... so frustrating, I just wish I could shut down my mind.

What I am looking forward to: The end. 4ish weeks and counting!!! {God willing} But while that is said, I am really just trying to enjoy being pregnant as best as I can. This is the last time for that and being a family of 3. I don't like change so there are a lot emotions going on for me right now, but I don't want to rush it.

Belly Button: Totally popped out. So embarrassing.

What I learned at my pre-natal visit:
33 week appt-fairly uneventful. Just measured my belly (33 weeks) and listened to the heart beat 150bpm. She then scheduled my GD {gestational diabetes} appt finally, since they dropped the ball on that one!

GD Appt: I have been experiencing a lot of high blood sugar symptoms lately (or so I assume, but couldn't be certain b/c I didn't have a meter yet.) so I was anxious to get to this appointment and get this under control. Leaving this un-controlled is not healthy for either of us!

Anyways, I got my meter and then the doc said I needed to see the dietitian. HA! I laughed and said I AM a dietitian, so I could just skip that step, all I need you to tell me is what carb level you want me at and I can handle the rest. The doc laughed too and said she would bring in the RD then for a quick visit instead of the routine sit down and educate this poor patient bit. They are all so nice. The RD even gave me her email out of professional courtesy in case I do have any questions.

I guess I go back and see the GD doc every week until D-day. I am just glad my OB and GD doc are in the same building and the appointments can be done at the same time. My GD doc said use your pregnancy with my staff and they will get you in every.single.time. We take our pregnant mommas very seriously here, you are our top priority! I thought that was great.

So far I only had one really high blood sugar of 416 YIKES! {that is super duper high for those of you who don't know} I need to stay under 120 after meals. That one made me a bit nervous. If my sugars don't stay down I will be put on insulin shots.

Symptoms: Uh, contractions STILL. I am so ready to get this show on the road. I realize it is a tad early, but it doesn't ease the frustration of dealing with the contractions and NOTHING happening.
Heart burn is starting. With Lo I had it all the time and it felt like I had swallowed sulfuric acid, so far not to bad, so does this mean he won't have much hair? ;) At least he is a boy, so the hair thing won't bother me as much as it did with Lo. HA!
So.very.HOT! You would think it was July they way I walk around here dressed. At night I just nearly sweat to death. So glad I am not pregnant in July or I would never make it. {I feel sorry for you Misa, Jendy and April!! ;)}

Interesting things that happened/anecdotes:
I keep running into several older women {at my assisted living communities I consult for} and they all tell me how "little" I am and how I must be having a girl! Wouldn't that be crazy. ;)
{I am still not completely over not having another girl, but I am excited about having a boy now--if that makes any sense.}

Lo is "telling" people Baby Q's name, only problem is no one understands her. Which Chad and I think is such a hoot!!

Whatever You're Doing

This song from Sanctus Real pretty much sums up my feelings right now, mostly in regards to this pregnancy. God is clearly trying to do something amidst this chaos, also known as this pregnancy, and all I can do is surrender to it.



This pregnancy has had so many things come up that have been less than positive, I really have been trying to be brave, but it just at times can seem overwhelming when the emotions all finally come crashing in around me. Today is one of those days, the flood gates broke and the emotions are out. I wasn't feeling to particularly keen on God about all of this today...I just don't "get it." Why I keep getting the short end of the stick, but then I heard this song and it spoke to me.

I am posting the lyrics for those of you who don't have time to "listen" to the song.

It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time to make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
And all I can do is surrender

(Chorus)
Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow Your will
Or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is You want from me
I give everything I surrender...
To...

(Chorus)

Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but now I can see
This is something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly
Something Heavenly

It's time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out

32 Weeks {aka Watch Mommy Grow}

How far along: 32w 1d

Baby Q 32w

Lo 31w

Total Wt Gain/Loss: +14# :/ I really should just stop looking at the scale, I find it terribly depressing...I know it's "good" and all, but it doesn't mean I have to like it.

Maternity Clothes: Definitely wearing, especially pants! I love dresses and tunics, but mostly just live in sweats.

Best Moment thus far: I am really getting anxious to meet him. I am starting to wonder what he will look like, hair? no hair? who will he favor? what will his personality be like? will he be a sleeper? or colicky like Lo?

Gender: BOY!

Movement: His movements aren't as great as Lo's were. I just feel him some, enough to know that he is in fact still alive. Not sure if this is a good thing or not?! Maybe this means he will be easy going and a sleeper?!

Milestones: Baby’s senses are continuing to improve -- when light peeks in through your (extremely) stretched belly, those tiny eyelids and irises blink and dilate. And, baby can now recognize and react to simple songs… time to start practicing your lullabies! Growth (at least inside your womb) is starting to slow, and you may notice baby descend into your pelvis at the end of this month. ~(courtesy of thebump.com)

Already feel him descending. He is so low in there I swear I might as well just stay in the bathroom, since he is under the impression my bladder is a squeeze toy. I honestly think I prefer rib kicks (which I don't get b/c he is so low.)

Food Cravings: Pizza, Chocolate, Soups (especially taco or tortilla), Apples and Raw Broccoli with Ranch dip. Mmmm good. Sugar cookies. (although that may be coming to an end.)

What I miss: My brain. It is official gone. Mommy brain + pregnancy brain is not a good combo! :)

Sleep: Not good. For whatever reason I am just struggling to sleep, even though I am so.very.tired. I start to fall asleep and right as I am about to drift of BAM! I wake myself up. So annoying.
On a positive note I can still {mostly} sleep on my tummy, I don't remember being able to do that at this point with Lo.

What I am looking forward to: The end. 6ish weeks and counting!!! {God willing} But while that is said, I am really just trying to enjoy being pregnant as best as I can. This is the last time for that and being a family of 3. I don't like change so there are a lot emotions going on for me right now, but I don't want to rush it.

Belly Button: Totally popped out. So embarrassing.

What I learned at my pre-natal visit: At my 29 week appt. we discussed my ever present, ever strengthening contractions. There are days and nights they get so strong and consistent that, if this was my first pregnancy I would be up in OB triage for sure, BUT because I know how bad active labor and contractions will get I stay at home and try to rest. All this to say I am now being checked now at exams. At 29 weeks, my I was thinning and softening, but no dilation.

At my 32 week appt I was sent to my OB for the duration of this pregnancy. (I had been seeing my PCP, because, well, why not). Anyway, they don't like my contractions, duh, so it is best to let her (my OB) handle it from here on out.
I was checked again, thankfully, still no dilation, but in a way it twerks me off because the strength and consistency of these contractions that I endure are doing nothing! But obviously, it is a good thing I have a stubborn cervix, just wish I didn't have to go through all this pain and have nothing happen. However, on the flip side once my body decides to get with the program, it gets with the program and I will go fast, so alas, I am happy nothing has happened yet...and my OB wants it to stay that way until at least 34 weeks after that she said they won't do much to stop it.
I am not allowed to travel for Christmas...good thing I have no where to go. HA! And I have to dial it down at the gym. Which I was already doing.
But all that to say, who the heck knows, besides God, when Baby Q will debut. I could go tomorrow, or be 2 weeks past my due date. Dilation or no it doesn't mean a darn thing, we all know stories of women who are dilated to a 4 for 3 weeks before the "go" and others who nothing seems to be happening and then BAM! They are in full on labor the next day. I just hope I don't have to endure all this for more than 5-6 more weeks however--selfish, yes, but it's the truth.

Oh and remember THIS POST {4 blood draws, 3 hours...} and how I said as an RD I was fairly confident I didn't "pass" the 3 hour?! Yeah, well guess who was right? Well, it wasn't the doctor. My OB looked at the numbers and said I borderline failed and that they would error on the side of caution. Which is what I thought from the beginning, but who am I, just a dietitian. SO I am suppose to have an appt with and endocrinologist sometime and start testing my blood sugars and watching my diet...who knows when that will be, I am already doing most of that, so whatev.

HB 132, measuring 30 weeks.

So there is all I have learned at my pre-natals over the last month. I go back in two weeks to learn more good news I am sure. :)

Symptoms: Uh, contractions. And I keep losing vision in my left eye every so often. Does that happen to anyone else while pregnant? It is so weird. I think the baby is just hitting a nerve, but still it isn't fun.

Interesting things that happened/anecdotes:
*In case some of you haven't caught on yet, Baby Q and Lo will be TWO years apart(ish). This pregnancy mirrors Lo, nearly week for week. Here is a picture of me 28 weeks pregnant with Lo in front of our tree.

28w pregnant with Lo!

Now here is one of me in the same outfit at 28 weeks in front of our tree. Do I look smaller, bigger, or the same?

Baby Q 28 weeks

I say bigger/same.

*Just hoping to make it to 36 weeks. Which incidentally is during TOC week, which I will find so funny if I go into labor then. {Sorry but inside family joke}.

*We have a name...finally, but it is still a secret so don't bother getting it out of me, my hairdresser already tried for over an hour and I STILL never caved! She ruthless I tell ya. ;)

Sorry this was so long, but I just want to remember everything as it is going on. One day someone may appreciate it.